Parenting Without A License

It All Gets Better From Here

Posted by Kimberly on March 22nd, 2005 — Posted in Zen Baby, Oncology Odyssey

I’m kinda whiny today.

Last night was the longest night of my life. You know that point you hit somewhere in the middle of week two with your newborn? Where you can’t even really *remember* what sleep is anymore? Last night made that look like cake.

If she wasn’t beeping, she was rasping. If she wasn’t rasping, she was crying (or trying to). There were tubes all over her–even one coming out of her nose. Her hands were bandaged so that she couldn’t pull the tubes out. The full dose of morphine interferred with her breathing. She’s still not allowed to eat, and doesn’t seem to want to yet.

And, since she freaked out if not in my arms, I haven’t been able to pump since 1 am. I spent most of the night trying to figure out how to get comfortable in one of those hard wood, Granny style rocking chairs (with a broken arm, no less) while clutching a post-op baby and not tangling or pulling out any of her various lines. Fun times, I tell ya.

And, because I’m crazy, I topped off that evening by coming in to work today. I think my judgement might be a bit off. (They’re watching a movie. And if we finish with that, group work!!)

But seriously, thanks for all the prayers and good wishes yesterday. I was deeply touched.

Hopefully, it all gets better from here