Traditions
Diva Girl is eight years old. How in the world did that happen?
I mean, I know how it happened, technically. The whole birds and the bees thing followed by the bad skin, enormous belly, pushing a fully functioning human being out of my body trick, and then that business of the earth having rotated 2920 times since then. But really, how did my baby get to be eight?
One of the best things about having a family of your own is the traditions–some fondly carried over from your own childhood, others that you create yourself as you go along.
From my own childhood, I’ve taken the cupcakes and a second verse to the “Happy Birthday” song that I’ve never heard outside of a family celebration. Diva Girl’s holiday birthday lead to the traditional Santa photo (always taken on December 14), and the nontraditional unbirthday celebration. And this year, the Shaolin Toddler’s inability (or unwillingness) to grasp the “Birthday Girl” concept has started a new tradition: the family birthday.
I guess the seeds of this particular tradition were planted during Regan’s second birthday, when I allowed Diva Girl to have her very own candle on her cupcake. They took root this year when, seeking to head off a toddlerific meltdown over the presents, I gave the Shaolin Toddler a gift of her own to open.
We’ve been working on the concept of birthday with Regan for a while leading up to her sister’s big day. Each time we talked about it, telling her that her sister’s birthday was coming up, she would chime in “yeah. And my birthday too!” To help give her a sense of time, we would then list off all the birthdays that happen between now and then until she was able to recite it as her personal birthday mantra: “First S’Bina, then Mummy, then Tyler, then REGAN!” I honestly thought she understood, until the big morning when she answered my announcement that it was Sabrina’s birthday with, “And Mummy’s. And Tyler’s. And mine.”
The entire day, Regan remained convinced that it wasn’t just Sabrina’s day, it was the whole family’s. Which really, when you think about it, is a pretty awesome way to look at it. Unless you’re the person whose birthday has been co opted, that is. But the Diva Girl was surprisingly zen about the whole thing. I thought she’d lose her cool when, after the second special verse of “Happy Birthday” was finished, Regan demanded “my turn!” She didn’t though; she drew a big breath and started to sing. And then they each blew out the candles on their respective cupcakes. After which Regan announced, “soon it’s my birthday. And Mummy’s. And S’Bina’s.”
I think we’ll be following this tradition for years to come.