The PsychoNetwork
20 Jul 2011 Leave a Comment
in Stupid does not descriminate
Facebook has got to be one of the most ingenious concepts that ever materialized! It has evolved from simply being a website to being a full on action verb. Taking about something important at work: “Hey, yeah…that sounds great! Just FACEBOOK me the details.” Running into an old high school friend: “It was soooo good to see you after thirty years. Do you FACEBOOK?” Want to totally embarrass a relative: “Dude, I am totally FACEBOOKING this?”
Everyone, and I mean everyone, has a Facebook page. My fifty year old parents Facebook, my bosses and coworkers also, my neighbors, my small group, all my friends and relatives, old college instructors, etc. I don’t know anyone without a Facebook account. I bet someone has even created a page for the homeless crackhead downtown that picks a fight with the parking meters or poops at the bus stop every weekend because I KNOW somebody has him in their “mobile uploads.”
I have a love-hate relationship with FB.
It can be a total conversation killer.
ME: “Hey, you won’t BELIEVE what happened to me yesterday!”
FB User: “Yeah, I saw it on FB already.”
ME: “Oh. So what’s new with you?”
FB User: “Did you not see my post this morning? I got like 25 comments and 38 likes!”
ME: “Nevermind.”
Conversation is pointless between habitual Facebookers.
Have you ever thought to yourself, “If you weren’t related to me, I would totally delete you as my Facebook friend!”
Do you find that your criteria to be someone’s friend on FB is set at a far lower standard than what you require of your real-life friends?
What the hell is a “poke”, anyway, and why is that so funny to some people?
Have you ever defriended someone because they play Farmville too much or kept flipping “poking” you for no reason?
Have you ever taken more than five minutes to come up with your status or googled a famous quote to make yourself sound smarter?
Have you ever posted a status, then “liked” it? That’s a little redundant, don’t you think…I mean, if you wrote the post then one would assume you like what you wrote. Just saying.
Have you ever anxiously awaited a co-worker to quit so you could defriend them?
Have you ever added someone you don’t know just because they sent you a friend request? Have you ever added someone you met once and now they post on your wall all the time?
Do you ever get tired of reading what other people are having for dinner? Do people ever “check-in” to anywhere other than a bar or restaurant…like the toilet, Lakeside, or 201 Poplar? Because, well, THAT’s the kind of stuff I want to see on MY newsfeed.
Don’t you always want to ask people what happened when they change their relationship status from “in a relationship” to “single”?
Go ahead…count how many girls you’re FB friends with that have a profile pic that shows more of their boobs than their face! I dare you!
Have you every scrutinized your profile pics to choose one that was “Facebook-worthy”? Don’t you hate it that your friends always tag you in the worst pictures you’ve ever taken in your whole life?
Have you ever been honked at waiting at a green-light that was red before you opened your mobile FB app to check your messages?
Have you ever gotten so bored that you get mad that nobody is posting on FB?
Yep, it’s addicting and quite ridiculous. I could go on and on, but the fact is: as annoying as FB can be it is also equally entertaining! It has brought old friends back into my life and allowed new friendships to grow. It provides a source of support, an outlet for anger and frustration, and a platform to share my randomness with the world. Happy Facebooking!
